Showing posts with label dreams. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dreams. Show all posts

24 January, 2008

Gamble on the bramble ramble ramble

State of mind: bleh
Current soundtrack: Black Jack 21 - Destiny (Shimatani Hitomi) on triple loop

I work on two briefs.

I tutor two classes and make them laugh, sometimes.

I have my first paycheck. (pictures laterterter)

I also have a huge rolling cold. Rhinovirii are attention whores!

Cold: *is coy and teasing*
M.Y.: Go 'way.
Cold: *whines*
M.Y.: Sod off, I have things to do.
Cold: *BITCHSLAPS M.Y. UPSIDE THE HEAD*
M.Y.: BAAAAAAK-CHOOM! (yes, I sneeze like that. In Caps Lock.)

Cold medicine brings strange dreams. I was back in my old highschool, and there was a tree with leaves of giant mantids, and flowers of butterflies. Also, one got to meet up with, judging by the age group, Sarutobi and three of her Ultrafriends. If you believe my brain the Ultra Galaxy series has spawned an RPG/FPS combo, the first chapter of which involves a fadorable grey puppy that belongs to...Hayata. I can't remember its name at the mo. The only way you could get tokens for it was with UG gashapons, and I didn't have the money so I watched on the sidelines.

06 January, 2008

M is for maudlin

State of mind: wistful
Current soundtrack: Ayashi no Ceres - Cross my Heart (Globe)

Ikusen no ai no kotoba yori
Anata ga soko ni iru dake de ii

(More than thousands of words of love
It is better that you are just there)
Destiny ~Taiyou no Hana~, Shimatani Hitomi

I am thinking rather hard of someone at the moment, and missing him greatly, though it really is for the best that he '(is) just there'.

One misses that singular warmth and friendliness, his very physical existence. He is not mine—I could not be so arrogant—but I wish he was, in some small part, and I miss him greatly from the bottom of my little fleshy heart. One wishes to pick his mind for philosophy and listen to his tales, to savour these foreign words and thoughts like a warm draught; to just be there with him once more, to be at rest.

Strange and beautiful, things ultimately are.

...For the love of Pete, it's not Black Jack. It's not Hikoboshi either, for those who know that story. Not even Ultraman! (And contrary to what SOMEONE thinks, it is far from YOU.)

(ETA 10/1/08)

30 December, 2007

One last meme

State of mind:
Current soundtrack: Ultraman Max Song Collection - Ashita ni Nareba (Project DMM)

[muse]Max songs contain a lot of the word 'genkai'. Mebius songs mention 'mugen' a lot. [/muse]

Well. As you can see, I'm back from Japan—and I returned with loads of UM stuff, a splinter in my finger, influenza virii and plenty of powerful memories. But before I actually, yanno, do some work and write up the whole trip, I thought I'd pop in what will probably be this year's last meme. :3

  1. Was 2007 a good year for you?
    Yes and no.
  2. What was your favorite moment of the year?
    ....Going to Ultramanland, obviously.
  3. What was your least favorite moment of the year?
    A toss up between ending the year's first term—it was a very aggravating three-four months—and getting Noa-tan snatched. If they TOUCH him, I hope he shocks their balls off. D:<
  4. What are your plans for 2008?
    Keep the job, start saving for UMLand AND Adobe Creative Suite, make new friends.
  5. What countries did you visit?
    Japan!
  6. What date in 2007 will remain etched in your memory?
    December 25th.
  7. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
    Got the YCLMS! *beam*
  8. What was your biggest failure?
    Failure to acquire any sort of social life. Pflurgh.
  9. Did you suffer any illness or injury?
    Flu, flu and more flu. And a twisted ankle.
  10. What was the best thing you bought?
    Can't think of anything beyond all that UM music at the moment.
  11. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
    In two words, Malaysian Parliament.
  12. Where did most of your money go?
    Food and books.
  13. What did you get really really really excited about?
    UMLANDUMLANDUMLANDJapanUMLANDUMLAND
  14. What songs will always remind you of 2007?
    Probably James Blunt's '1973'. Ironic, I know.
  15. 15. Compared to this time last year are you:
    a) Fatter or thinner?
    Slightly more weighty.
    b) Happier or sadder? Sadder. One more layer of cynicism—although when the happy breaks out, it shows all over!
    c) Richer or poorer? Marginally richer. Angpow money, mah. XD
  16. What do you wish you'd done more of?
    Socialising, schmoozing and asking questions.
  17. What do you wish you'd done less of?
    Self-doubting.
  18. How will you be spending Christmas?
    I SPENT it. At Ultramanland, surrounded by stage shows, squeeing adorable children* and men in rubber suits.
  19. Which LJ/MySpace users did you meet for the first time?
    ...BNF-known-as-N doesn't count, does she?
  20. Did you fall in love in 2007?
    Speak not to me of love.
  21. How many one night stands?
    What did I just TELL you!?
  22. What was your favourite TV show?
    Mebius KINDA went on into 2007. Haven't watched any of those episodes though. ^^;
  23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
    Eyep.
  24. What was/were the best books you read?
    For One More Day (Albom), Papa is Ultraseven, Home Sweet Home (Miyanishi), Never Let Me Go (Ishiguro), UM Story Zero (Mabune)
  25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
    Josh Groban. Yum yum!
  26. What did you want and get?
    Ultraman music. The YCLMS scholarship. Some work. Lots of education.
  27. What did you want and not get?
    Ultraman Fighting Evolution for the PSP TT__TT
  28. What was your favourite film this year?
    300. SPARTAAAAAAAAAAAA!
  29. What did you do on your birthday and how old were you?
    I went to class, watched a movie—300—and through serendipity met some old friends for nonalcoholic drinks. I turned 20. I still don't really 'feel' it.
  30. What one thing would have made your year more satisfying?
    A love interest, perhaps? One that reciprocated, for once?
  31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?
    Chunky shirts and mansandals. ;) Also, I discovered layers. And makeup. And the fact I don't look half bad in traditional Eastern costume.
  32. What kept you sane?
    Ultraman. Not the fandom batshittery, mostly just Ultraman in itself.
  33. Which celebrity did you fancy the most?
    Josh Groban. Again, yum yum!
  34. Which political issue stirred you the most?
    BERSIH walk followed by the batshit that was HINDRAF. Brain hurty, kthxbi.
  35. Who did you miss?
    My sister. Shortly. Currently it's a few good men back in Arao.
  36. Did you treat somebody badly in 2007?
    I may have.
  37. Did somebody treat you badly in 2007?
    It is possible.
  38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned this year?
    Three things are very important: gumption, social skills and time management.
  39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year...
    *cough*
    My past rides into my memories
    And it's coming again with this music
    I'm trying to fight for me
    For my life; for my right
    (Another Day Comes, Pay Money To My Pain)

[+/-] Was 2007 a good year for YOU?...

If I don't see y'all again before the year is out, here's wishing you a happy, happy 2008!

*apparently the words 'adorable' and 'children' coming out from my mouth = sign of the apocalypse.

15 December, 2007

Huh.

State of mind: bleh
Current soundtrack: Alphonne humming

Nothing's quite as unique a downer as realising the disc that held your Honshu visit photos from whay back when? Never actually did.

Just sayin'.

...at least the UMLand photos are intact. *emo*

(ETA 15/12 - Gyaaa I take that back. Nothing's quite as unique a downer as going through the above, then dreaming your family goes missing while shopping for pork in a backwater Indonesian market.)

27 October, 2007

私たちはもう 光の国に帰って参れぬ。

State of mind: gleeful
Current soundtrack: redballoon's Yuki no Tsubasa single

I had a dream where I went to a fantastic library. By fantastic, I mean there was a veritable final tome of Ultra information. Canon, noteable manga adaptions, stuff like that. Oddly enough, there was no mention of Ultra Ninja Manual.

The interesting part was that it showed some rather dubious backstory as to how Ultraman and Seven came to protect Earth. Showa canon dictates that Man kind of followed trouble down to our little blue home, and Seven apparently did something of similar ilk. (Why the heck was he poking around mountains, anyway?) On the other hand, we now have Man on the moon, sufficiently googlie-eyed upon beholding this new planet 'so beautiful...it could drop from the sky were one to not hold it up', and Seven heading down to Earth on Man's request. But oh, my friends, this read like a whackjob fanfiction. Man used to be a traffic cop on M78, and Seven was just...drunk a lot. But somehow they met, and gazing at the Earth from the moon, looming large and blue and misty, they thought as one 'Watashi-tachi wa mou...Hikari no Kuni ni kaette mairenu.'

It was sheer beauty. I had to look it up again (although as is wont with dreams, the content changed slightly). There it was, reversed white against the black, black blackness of space: 'We already...cannot return to the Land of Light'. It was not a matter of doing, but a matter of capability; transfixed by this planet, they could not leave more than they would not.

And then I woke up to battle my cold in a slightly dustier reality, sans that book. Goooods, I desire that book. There were several Scandalous Revelations I should have liked to read over.

That night I dreamt my teeth fell out.

24 June, 2007

Short, for once.

State of mind: thoughtful
Current soundtrack: the whirr of the aircon

I've been having strange dreams about pale-skinned alien women recently. That's all I should say, for fear of further public confirmation that I'm Stark Raving Bonkers.

Took the compulsory extra two hours of driving classes today. It didn't turn out too badly, I think! At least the engine didn't die and for the most part, I didn't run into anybody. The rearview mirror is like a revelation.

17 June, 2007

'They were to come back for me, but they never did...'

State of mind: surprised (and slightly drowsy)
Current soundtrack: The white noise of the fan and the ticking of the keyboard

This is probably going to make no sense to anyone except myself, but what the hey.

It's been a very weird weekend, as I found some fairly old doodles I made while taking my trial HCEs three years ago. One of them included a backstory for one of my characters, Hakugin (Shi had nicer footwear then. I might bring that back.), and it involved two soldiers who were later reincarnated as...well, two others in an already established series. I won't go any further. One was skinny and brash, the other was a big, sweet man. The weird part? A year later, I had to prepare a script for my Drama class. Not only did I turn it into ANOTHER Hakugin backstory, conveniently forgetting this one, I managed to transplant the two characters in—and switch their personalities AND reincarnations. Skinny and brash became slim and innocent. Big and sweet became strong and silent.

...I swear when I scripted Never Alone, Kiichiro and Jinnosuke were designed then. I didn't quite expect them to turn up a year prior to that on an old Math Magic competition form, or hide in my brain and await a chance for rebirth.

Also, I had a dream about being scammed on a family holiday - twice. The first had the whole clan walking home through colourful, chest-high tulip fields (please remember I live in a TROPICAL country), and the next had me kidnapped and thrown into freezing 'brown water', only to later chase courting hornbills and get bitten by the irate male of the pair. To be fair, They were extremely pretty crowned pigeons at the start of my dream. Even better was the look in the male's eyes when I finally stopped playing dead, before he chewed by nose off—"Ha, see, I knew you were alive, you naked Wingless! Phear my 1337 papa hornbill sk33l5!"

05 June, 2007

All ur text are belong to ME.

State of mind: frazzled
Current soundtrack: Snatches of 'Purple People Eater'

Guess who's the copywriter/editor for Batch 51's graduation campaign? X3 Between me and my trusty, equally grammar-finicky assistant, no syn(tax) shall go unpunished*! No verb shall be treated as a noun! The F7 button will sing beneath our fingers! Behold, TOA, She-Noun and the Masters of the Grammarverse! *triumphant cartoon music* One small problem—I really don't know anyone in the board besides some of my classmates. I guess now's a good opportunity to get to know some people from other majors besides the old foundation gang.

Internship is going along quite smoothly. So far, so good—we're all bouncing merrily off each other and it's proving to be a pleasant experience. Expect to see some of my sketches here soon. :D

I had a horribly, unashamedly moe-riffic dream last night. There was an Ultraman event on for the school holidays—a GREAT BIG event!!!—in which Noa handled a crying baby expertly (cue squeeing from author), I saw a massive flock of Brahminy kites on a beach and life was so good I refused to wake up until I'd overslept one hour. :P

Firnheledien comes over tomorrow for a visit! ♥ But tonight...proposal work. @_@ *reluctantly detaches self from blogging and goes to work*

* we sincerely hope.

22 May, 2007

Three months in twenty minutes

State of mind: amused?
Current soundtrack: DNAngel - Byakuya ~True Light (Miyamoto Shunichi)

It was either the internalised stress from the test or the Flaming Sambal pizza I ate for dinner (I prefer Domino's Spicy Sambal*, but it was worth a try), but I had a dream about strange large twin dogs, where one got tumours and mange yet the other suffered and died; a super sekrit mamak joint run by RTD officers, all of them in headscarves; and everyone in this strange dream world with hovering nametags and dropdown action menus MMORPG style, before my cramping insides sent me fleeing to the loo.

I don't think I'm going to get that image of the headscarved examiner yelling "Ya Allah, what are you doing!?" for a long while yet. Aish, tudung trauma...OTL

* has this site not heard of image slicing?

05 March, 2007

In which one talks of many things.

State of mind: in pain
Current soundtrack: Whatever it is they're playing at the printer's (but bless Mr. William and his wireless connection!)

The world has decided to treat me quite nicely as of late. Ideas and concepts for Motion Graphics and MM Production have been approved without too much fuss and flurry, which is pleasing to say the least! Online Media 3 is still about the same, though. It's a very complicated situation. Suffice it to say the 'client' wants us to sell the product without revealing anything about it and there are two 'managers' who can't seem to agree on what they would like us to do. No wonder my group is 'ResLes'. Yes, I made up that name. I iz smurt.

...I don't think 'real' projects are like this, are they? D:

-

I have a penfriend in Japan, back from my school days. Online she's known as Delilah; she runs/used to run a fansite for Koumyou Sanzo. It's all kinds of cute, but now I can't even remember the URL. Or the site name. *swt* We haven't been keeping in touch for some time — my fault here, as preparing for the scholarship presentations and such last year took up a fair bit of time. I did, however, manage to send her a postcard last month just before the CNY hols, thanking her for her birthday wishes, filling her in on the situation here and apologising for the delay between replies.

Today the post came as I was looking out the upstairs window and I knew she'd written back. Would you believe I could pick her postcard ('tis almost always a postcard) right out from the pile of mail we'd received? Two floors down? In any case she congratulated me on the scholarship offer, included New Year's wishes and went on to reassure me that all was cool and everyone had busy times. She went on to add 'Besides...you and me are and will always be good friends after all.' Oh damn, she got me there. I hadn't written to her for so long and she had every right to think this fandom-based friendship was over, but it was like nothing had changed...except for the fact this time her postcard was really messy. ;) I hope she's doing OK. She's not the type to make so many spelling mistakes per postcard, my surname aside..I really must bring that up with her the next time I write.

One wishes one had or could make more friends like this, but in life sometimes you take what you get. Thanks Delilah-san, you're really, really something.
-

The ninth day of Chinese New Year (out of 15, for the non-local readers) is said to be the Jade Emperor's birthday. Hokkiens hold this day in highest regard, and on that day we hold certain prayers and rites (Pai Thnee Gong, which is how the papers like to spell it). Marion D'Cruz would have a right good laugh at me, but this is the one day I feel most Hokkien out of the year. The rest of the time I'm the polytheistic Buddhist banana who goes round bending paradigms. At midnight on the ninth day, I may be praying to Thnee Kong in English, but I'm holding those joss-sticks and folding the gold offerings with the rest of the women. It's kind of comforting, and some kind of anchor, if you like. And this year, I have a new phone, so I took some pictures (coming as soon). This I can do. This I can profile. This is my festival.

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The preparations start a bit earlier, when the offerings are set up for the altar. Pineapples, plums, pomeloes, oranges and longan Usually my grandmother puts red paper cuttings on top of and below the stuff, but this year we went without. She is 80-something, and those are small scissors...maybe next year I'll take her place. At about 9-10 pm the altar gets prepared for the prayers, and the front is draped (sort of) with this cloth. It's a fairly interesting cloth, what with the lions and the brass studs and the 8 Immortals round the top edge.

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This is what the altar looks like after we're all done praying.
Sometimes I forget halfway what I want to ask Thnee Gong and end up with long gaps of silence as I wave the joss-sticks, but it went all right this year. What did I ask for? SECRET.

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Now comes the good part. We fold the gold! Every year my gran goes out and buys this special type of hell's money paper, which is stamped with gold leaf and has a stylised picture of the 3 Gods of Prosperity (Fu, Lu, Shou). She prefolds it into these triangles, and after we finish prayers, out comes the paper and the little plastic stools, and all the ladies sit outside in the night air folding up a big pile of gold as an extra, final offering to Thnee Gong. After this there are more sheafs of hell's money on top, folded to look like sheafs, there is a last confirmation of prayers before the altar and the pile of gold is set aflame.

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People say that when you see the sparks going up and disappearing into the sky, it's a sign the offering of gold has reached Thnee Gong. Logic tells you it's just little sparks borne up on a hot wind, going out and floating down in the darkness, but then you remember the one year where the sparks did NOT go up properly and your grandmother broke her leg, your mother got stuck in a horrible job and your sports house lost horribly in the school sports. True story, this.

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My belief system condones midnight snacking. When the last embers have burned out and everyone's done with flouting the rules against open burning *shifty eyes* some of the cakes come off the altar and go back into the house, where we cut them up and eat them. :D I assume it's kinda like eating birthday cake. All the bright red ones are ang koo or 'red turtles'; the pink one is huat kueh or 'prosperity cake'; the flat white one is bee koh or sweet glutinous rice. I don't know why I like huat kueh — it's bright pink and doesn't really taste of much — but I'll happily cut off chunks and start munching contentedly.

After that everyone goes home and sleeps, hoping that they won't wake up late for classes or work tomorrow. Birthday or no birthday, Thnee Gong's people gotta EARN!

-

Circumstances come together in long and convoluted chains (particularly when I try to relate them) and suffice it to say I read a manga called Star of Happiness: Haghall. It's about an alien from the moon who's trying to prove to God-the-balding-disembodied-head that humans need not be destroyed just yet and there are good people still among them. It's part alien comedy, part existential drama and occasionally rather heartwarming.

I had a rather disturbing dream a few days back where there was an animated version of Haghall - possibly a movie. They found him guilty of killing a whole bunch of babies by strangulation, and the way he put it he said he prevented them from becoming the 'flaws' they would have grown up to be. It was a bit disturbing, but it DID fit in creepily with the tone of the actual manga. And I could actually see him doing this, trying to save the Earth from being ruled by pillbugs and telling God see, there are good people, you need not kill everybody off yet.

What I don't understand is how nobody has yet screamed at Haghall "WHY ARE YOU LIGHT GREEN!?" even if he's 'supposed' to be some Mexican masked wrestler on an exchange program. :/

19 January, 2007

1.6 OPM; or The Value of Creativity

State of mind: contemplative
Current soundtrack: The sound of crickets and nighttime traffic

So I DID manage to take a successful nap last night—woke up, and all—but it did result in some very strange (if very nice) dreams afterwards. My good friends Lu, Es and Prog, did we not discuss this issue very carefully? We do not want any repetitions of last year's Hikoboshi Incidents Mad Mood Swings of Doom. Settle down, give it a few years. We'll all get satisfaction eventually. I hope.

Some more buildup to the main topic of this post: I promised the readership of my old blog (soon to be locked completely, is my guess) that when I went through this term's Marketing and Creative Thinking class, I'd keep a tally of how many times the lecturer said 'okay'. Without giving too much detail away, said lecturer is known to be quite...'flouncy', and this is even more pronounced when he gets excited about something - hence the decision to make a finalised tally. In the space of almost two hours, he said the word over 100 times, and his final count is about 1.6 okays-per-minute. (Of course, I should talk. If I was relating this to you verbally, every third word would have been 'like'. :P)

Aaaanyway. Part of the lecture involved asking people what creativity was, and what the value/purpose of creativity was. As the lecturer put it, why do clients hire us? After much debate up and down and various oh-so-close(?) answers, he delivered his answer: it makes more money. And really, that's all there is to it.

Somehow, this doesn't sound right to me. I mean, sure, we're all going to end up creating commercial art of some sort; that's how we're going to earn our rice/bread/carbs. But that can't be the be-all and end-all of things. Even if you are creative, and you make piles of money, if you hate your work, hate what you do and have to drag yourself to the computer/easel/storyboard every morning...I hate to break it to you, but you probably shouldn't be doing this for the next 30 years. Call me a bit idealistic, but the last bit is common sense. If you're going to be slogging, it might as well be for something you really love. Then it won't even be a slog. To me, the greatest value of creativity is that it improves the quality of life. I figure that counts as making you happy, making things easier and serving as a coping mechanism. The world stops dead without its engine of imagination and thought.

There was supposed to be more to this, but 1) I figured I'd keep it short and 2) I don't trust myself to go on much longer without rambling and/or engaging in the sin of TMI. ;) And don't tell, but one thing I did want to define creativity as was 'eating dirt and shitting diamonds'. ;)